November 30, 2009

• 'Tis the Season

  As one or two of you may know, I am (and have been for as long as I can remember) kinda hard on the things I've made myself. I always worry that they aren't good enough, that they need to be perfect, and they just aren't.

  With the arrival of my niece this summer (cutest baby girl EVER!), I felt very strongly that I wanted to make her Christmas stocking. My mom made all our stockings, plus our tree skirt. (She didn't make crafts all the time, but she did have her moments, especially when it came to us kids.) Well, a couple of weeks ago, I got started. And I remember thinking to myself, "Well, Vivy, I'm sorry you're going to have to settle for my stocking instead of getting one your grandma made. She always did such a good job."

  Then it hit me - how sad is that? I automatically assumed that my stocking would be inferior to one Mom would have made. Sure, she had a bit more experience doing these felt projects, but it's not like my work is poor. Okay, I can look at most anything I've made and find some little detail that I don't like, but that's the nature of having something that's hand-made. Besides, if I put a stitch where I didn't mean to, or something hasn't looked quite right, I've gone back and redone it. (Which is why the stocking is taking me ages. Eh, at least it's not like she has to have it this year; I'm aiming to have it done in time, but I'd rather finish it later and have it be something I can stand to look at year after year without cringing.)

  I started decorating my tree this weekend, and I'm lucky enough to have ornaments made by three generations on the branches - me, my mom, and my grandma. And you know what? The ones I've made stand up just fine when put next to the ones made by Mom and Grandma. Heck, I even had one that I thought Grandma made when I first took it out of the box until I remembered it was one I made last year. (Hey, at a certain point, styrofoam and sequins all start to look alike.)

  So I'm hoping I've at least started to go a little easier on myself. Not that I want to throw together crap and call it art, but I don't have to feel like it's perfect in order to be any good. Besides, I need to give myself permission to mess up, otherwise I won't make anything at all. And I have a whole closet full of craft supplies just begging to be used, especially this time of year.

  *************************************************

  On a quick and unrelated note, by this time next week, I should be gainfully employed. Hooray!

  As a not-so-tiny miracle in this market, the job actually found me. The company recruiter found my resume on CareerBuilder.com, I interviewed, they liked me, I liked them, and once they've confirmed that I'm not on drugs and didn't lie on my resume, what will hopefully be a beautiful match has been made. It's also the first time I've actually negotiated on my salary, and while I didn't get quite as much as I would have liked, I did get an extra week of vacation time. I'm really stoked about that - not just the extra week, but the fact that I actually had the guts to make a counter-offer and not just automatically accept their first offer. Especially considering how much I needed this job.

  I'm also excited that, while I will still be in communications, it's not a marketing role. Don't get me wrong, I think I'm pretty good at marketing communications, but it's certainly not what I would have guessed I would be doing. This will be more newsletters and internal engagement, with a smattering of trade show organization thrown in. I'm really looking forward to it.

  • 2:18 pm
  • 2 Comments